Parenting and the Mob

April 6, 2018

I never knew I was a member of the mafia until I became a parent.

“Oh, I see you didn’t eat your chicken. It would be a real shame if something happened to Doggie. No one would want that.”

“Wow, this is quite a mess in here. It better be clean when I come back, or Bunny gets it.”

“I’ve got an idea. Let’s brush your hair and get ready to go.”

“But, I don’t want to!”

“We can brush it while you’re sitting in time out. Would you like that? Huh?”

In the Earbuds: Young Hearts by BUNT. (feat. BEGINNERS)

This song, Young Hearts, is infectious.

The honky-tonk piano and synth trumpet create a strong urge to smile. Life affirming and empowering lyrics. There’s another non-remix version out there which is equally delightful. This song eventually hooked me because I heard it repeatedly in a Spotify ad. Don’t listen to Spotify? Try it! www.Spotify.com. You can hear virtually every song in the world on demand. Except Tool for some reason. You can hear me on Spotify, though! Take a listen to my playlist.

Self-Aware Bathroom Faucets

April 2, 2018

The Pitfalls of Modern Life

Technology is a wonderful thing, without a doubt. The advances are mind-blowing. Who would have thought that my phone could have more processing power than the NSA of 1965?* However, I’ve come to realize there are challenges with our advancing technology. Some people think we are more prone to look at a screen now than talk to an actual person. I don’t really care about that, but this is what I do care about: we are in the awkward adolescence before all commodities become self-aware, and that can lead to great confusion and suffering.
For example, the other day I walked directly into a door and smashed my face. I assumed it was an automatic door, because every reputable place has one. It was not. I need to tell me wife to get with the program at our house.
Furthermore, I can’t count how many hours I have wasted holding my hands under a bathroom faucet waiting for the water to come out, only to find it was one of those antique models with a handle (HAN – duhl).
I’ve hit 10 pedestrians with my Tesla because the auto-pilot feature wasn’t working. The judge explained that not all car companies have auto-pilot and just because my car has a “T” on it doesn’t mean it is a Tesla. It’s people like this judge that don’t appreciate the difficulty of living in these modern times.
If the robots want to come and take my job, that’s fine with me. I look forward to the A.I. consummation when I can sit at home in my easy chair all day with drones scanning my stomach to sense hunger and buzz over to drop Cheez-Its in my mouth.

*This fact still pending verification

In the Earbuds: Insurgentes by Steven Wilson

A solo album from the former front-man of Porcupine Tree, Insurgentes is spacey, moody, unpredictable, powerful, and engrossing. Wilson’s Pink-Floyd-meets-90’s-hard rock vibe has soft, almost monotone vocal melodies overtop brooding, spooky clean guitars, followed by chunky rock riffs battering your cranium. The melodies themselves are simple, but enchanting, especially on the closing song – a gentle piano ballad. I’d recommend this for fans of prog, but even fans of alternative rock could find something to suit them. Great stuff!

Matt Bankert Live!

January 21, 2018

Matt Bankert Digitally Live

I am planning to play a digital acoustic concert via live stream over the Internet! As far as the time and content of the concert, I would love nothing more than to give the people what they want. But I don’t know what they want! If you’d like to see such a concert, oh person, would you please tell me what you would prefer? Just click below!

Stay tuned for my announcement on when the concert will be. I hope you can tune in!

In the Earbuds: “Paranormal” by Alice Cooper

These days seem to be a renaissance of veteran rockers returning to make new and really good music (see Museletters 4, 8, 9 for reviews of Metallica, Ray Davies, Van Halen, and Matthew Sweet). This is the 127^th (give or take 100) studio album by the original shock-rocker and evangelical Christian, Alice Cooper. Although he turns 70 next month, Cooper and his signature snarl are as visceral as ever. These songs are gripping and powerful with attractive melodies. There is a spooky Trans-Siberian vibe on the title track and hyped-up Hendrix riffs on “Dead Flies.” “Rats” sounds like a deranged and enraged Chuck Berry howling out a low view of humanity. A “love” song only Alice Cooper could write, “Fallen in Love (And I Can’t Get Up),” has a great ZZ Top blues rhythm – so much so, they had to get Billy Gibbons himself to play guitar on it.

There is an Iggy and the Stooges kind of sound on “Private Public Breakdown” and “You and all your friends.” The production is polished and punchy. This album is hard to stop listening to. Highly recommended!

You can hear the spotlight on Alice cooper on my latest playlist on Spotify: “Give Me Liberty and Give Me Rock”